"I knew you would come to me." - He said, without turning towards me.
"I wonder how." - I snorted sarcastically. - "Would you care to explain why did you do what you did?"
"What did I do?" - He asked with a faked faked innocent expression. I had a sudden urge to hit him. But I fought off the urge, and walked up to the railing.
"I want to know why did you tell Rider that you had me. That was not the wisest action you could do, because it put all of us at risk. He believed that he was my one and true love, and even though I don't love you, he could have send us away." - I turned towards Joel. - "What had happened between us meant nothing emotionally, and it was a necessary action to heal your wounds, so I do not understand your intentions."
To that, he smirked, and rolled his eyes. - "Of course you wouldn't. You just go around, make all of us believe that you are a helpless little bird, then amaze us with your strength, finally soften us with your affection. You never knew what you do to men..." - I almost laughed at him, with the faked affection in his eyes. Was I supposed to believe this extremely shitty acting?
"I call bullshit on that." - I pointed at him. - "I know you, Joel. I've seen some things you've done, the way you think. You don't fall in love. You did this, because you had something to gain from it."
He licked his lips nervously, and turned his head away. - "Why couldn't you just go on with my version? It would have been so much easier."
"That might have been easier, but I came for the truth, not for some white lie." - I sighed. - "Besides, what would you do if I would have believed that you really fell for me?! Joel, lying to people who look at you as a friend won't do you any good."
"That might be, but it would have kept you safe." - He murmured. - "Can we go and talk in private?" - I just nodded, and we walked back to his bedchamber. Now that Rider knew about the past, it was a risk to go to either of our chambers, but we needed a safe place to talk. I wanted the truth from him.
"I will be honest with you now." - He began as the doors closed behind him - "My father back in Skydown commanded me to win you, to fool you that I love you, and make you love me too. He wanted you to choose me when the time of succession came, so the Severio Clan would connect with the Princeps forever.
I couldn't do much, since I was dying, and soon Skydown was taken over by demons. My brother, Stephen saved me, and brought me here. Then you lost your memory, and I didn't want to even see you, because I knew that at the moment, I would have no chance of pulling you into this plan. eventually the pain got worse, so I didn't really have another choice, but to go and see you, hoping that you had a way to save my life. Then, you came up with the idea that I should mess with your head a little to free your memories. It would have actually worked as we first tried it, just with you holding my hand. It would have been enough, but I saw a chance, and I took it.
Having sex with you wasn't a necessary step for you to have your memories back, nor me to get better. Telling Rider the truth was necessary if I wanted to knock off the competition."
"Joel, this is madness. You do not need to marry me to connect the two clans. We are already connected in an alliance. However, I am very angry with you for lying." - I felt betrayed, all over again. My naivety got me into trouble once again, way too similar to the first one that had broke my heart. - "We have an alliance way stronger than love would ever chain us together. I have shortened my life for you, for fuck's sake!"
"I know, I remember it. You placed a damned scar on my chest, so even if I might forget, all I gotta do is go to the bathroom for a shower, and as soon as I take off my shirt, I would be reminded." - He sat down in an armchair, and dug his hands in his jet-black curls. - "Spirit, this plan that my father had forged is important to me. That was the last thing he had asked from me."
"So in memory of Rufus, you betrayed me. Well done, Joel." - I was getting more and more angry. - "If you were me, what would you do? Seriously, at the moment, I am just so confused, I don't know what to do with you."
He stood up, and walked towards me. He placed his hand on my neck, and pushed me up against the wall. - "Do not think that you are untouchable, Spirit Princeps. Just because you are a heir of a clan as powerful as yours, you are still just a little guppy trying to swim with the big fish in the pond. You need me to survive." - I pushed him off of me.
"I gave you back your life. Twice... I turned you into a full-blooded angel." - I walked towards him, feeling the flames bursting between my fingertips. - "I am a big fish. I am a Princeps."
"Oh, let me guess, and you 'have your people to protect' as well, don't you?" - He smiled mockingly. - "When we first met, you were a scared little girl, hiding from the big bad demons, frightened to even try to find her sister. You had been hiding in my house, flirted with my brother, and hoped that if you ignore the situation, it would go away.
You are a coward, not a big fish. Haven't you had a good look around? You are the spark that started this war: those words spoken in the meeting hall about rights, and kindness... you set off a bomb. The consilium is not being cruel because they love to harm people, but because that's the only way our kind can be fully controlled: with fear. Your little visions that you share with Rider about a peaceful society would never come true, because the creatures of magic will never live in peace. We are all to hungry for power that there will always be people questioning the person who is on the top ruling them. There will always be riots and traitors among 'your people' hungry for your blood." - I turned my head away from him, because I saw the truth behind his words. He lit a cigarette. I thought he was done, but he continued anyways. - "I am sick of people. You think they are there for you, but all they always want something from you."
"That's kind of ironic coming from you." - I said, and tightened my hands into fists, so the flames would die between my fingers.
"I'd make sure that no harm comes to you, if you would agree to come with me to the Consilium. You would take your rightful place as the head of the Sub, and everything would go back to normal. If you were in that position, you could even change some rules about the brutality without turning people against each other and wetting the lands with their blood."
"But for that, I would have to become your wife, don't I?" - I asked, and I felt annoyance taking over the great amount of anger.
"Why are you so against it? I am offering you a great deal for peace, for a plan that might actually work." - He slowly walked to the windows. - "Look, this isn't just about the war, and all these battles that are being planned to beat the consilium, or the rebels. For me, it is also about me." - I flicked the butt of the cigarette out in the window. - "As selfish as it sounds. I have always been the black sheep of my family; the one that was always good for nothing. If I could prove that I am worthy of something, that would make me feel better... that I wasn't just put into this world to fuck things up."
"You know that it's not true. You could become a legend, if you stay by my side, as a friend. And an ally. If you would come with me, we could show the world your real worth." - I put my hand on his shoulders, but he shook me off.
"This is not a good solution. If you teach the people that they can rebel, and they can win, they would never stop rebelling. You won't be able to hold them in their place. They are not powerless humans. It would only take a handful of them to burn your dreams of this new world to ashes." - He took my right hand in his, staring into my eyes. - "You can stop now, there is still a chance."
As I looked at him, my heart ached, because I knew that he doesn't understand me. He doesn't understand that fear is never the answer. Yes, I might be naive, but I knew that people serve a person they look up to with all of their hearts, while they look forward to the death of the man they fear. I pulled my hand out of his grip, cupped his face in my hands, and hissed his forehead.
"Joel Severio, second son of Lord Rufus, brother of the Depth-Consilium member, Darren Severio... I command you and your brother, Stephen Severio to return to Hell-Blossom." - I have never commanded anyone... never. But I knew that Joel won't leave, if I just asked him to. My lips twitched from my tears that I had held back. - "And never return."
With that, I turned my back on him, and left the room. Angels never prayed. Nor did the Nephilim. But at the moment, I felt the need to ask a greater force for guidance. I didn't know if god existed, I didn't know if anyone hears my prayers, so I turned to the only force I knew about: The nature. I changed clothes to gray pants and a white tank top. I unarmed myself completely, and walked out of the castle. No one tried to stop me, which was good.
I walked out, and following the rocky route, I got to the top of the mountain. One great Oak stood at the top, very similar to the tree of Ambriel. I walked closer, and sat down at the bottom of it. Looking up, the shards of blue sky pierced through the blanket of leaves. This place was peaceful, and quiet. The only sound was the howl of the wind, and the distant sound of the sea. I closed my eyes, and imagined that I was back at the library of powers. My breathing slowed, and the library slowly took shape. Rows of shelves with vibrant colors and shapes, the huge white tree in the middle, breaking through the ceiling, like the trees in the library of Skydown. I walked to the tree, and put a hand on it's white, ghost-like bark. This time my hands didn't slip through it. Biting my lip, I turned around.
What did I need? From one of the rows, a huge falcon flew upwards. It had golden wings, and a silver beak. I ran towards it, trying to catch up. Finally I found it at another place like where the tree stood. It was sitting on the top of a black fountain. Instead of water, the fountain sprayed molten flames of gold, like the flames I have when I fight. On the fountain, A woman sat, carved from the same black marble, holding a plate of golden flames. The falcon screeched at me, and I took a step closer.
Flectebat genu in fronte reginae. - I heard the voice. It was just a soft whisper, but still I was sure, if someone had stood at the other side of this great hall, he would have heard it as well.
"I am sorry, but I do not understand." - I said, and licked my lips nervously.
Bend your knee, when you face the queen. - The voice replied in English now. I looked at the falcon, and slowly knelt down. Was she the queen? But the queen of what? - You are questioning my power and my place. - The voice was calm and cold, like old steel.
"Tell me your name." - I said, as I stood up.
I am the Queen of Wind, the Snow, the Cold, and the Lost. I am the mother of Nephilim. My name is Spiritus Princeps. - The sound was still less than a whisper, almost voiceless.
"You are my grandmother then." - I smiled, and took a step closer, but the falcon took off, and flew to the closest shelf, then settled on top of it. Clearly, it didn't want to be near me. - "Please, I need help."
You do not. Your problem is that you are afraid of connecting your life forever with another individual. - The falcon lowered it's head, and it's shape began to change. Slowly, it became a woman with silver skin, and hair, dressed in a golden gown. But the figure was faint, and see through. - Child, you came from the free lands that I could never see. When I gave birth to Mitis, they forbid me to leave the holy lands ever again. You were born to be free, but still you came back to be the prisoner of the Consilium. Why? - As she talked, her mouth didn't move.
"I came back to free these creatures from the brutality of the consilium, not to be a prisoner." - I corrected her. A thin smile appeared on her beautiful lips. Her hair was braided into a tight french-braid, and the crown on her head seemed to make her uncomfortable with the weight. She wasn't fragile, but she wasn't super muscular either.
You cannot free them. The people ruled by the consilium are selfish creatures, and without a strong hold on them, they would riot and cause chaos among the peaceful. - She said exactly what Joel did. - You don't see it, because you grew up in the world of the living. These people need guidance from a leader they can fear.
"Why do they need to fear us? Why can't thy just look up to the leaders?" - I asked the glowing figure. She floated down from the shelf, walking on thin air, like she was walking down on the stairs.
Jealousy is the poison that kills peace in the matter of seconds. Everyone seeks power, but only some are powerful enough. - She touched my face, but I didn't feel it. - Creatures of magic need fear to be tamed. You have to learn to be cruel, or flee from this world, shut it out, and go back to be a human.
"I can't turn back now." - I said, imagining how would I live, if I was forced to go back to Santa Fe. - "If I have to marry someone to fulfill what is expected from me, then that's what i am gonna do. But who should I marry?"
It is always a hard choice. Chose the one, who is the wisest. Chose the one who cannot live without you, nor you can live without him. Chose the one who would lend you his powers at need, and the one, who would move mountains at your will. But you should make the choice only in head, then wait until he comes to you for your hand. - Spiritus' whisper was faint, but still the best advice I had gotten so far, even though she was talking in riddles. - When the darkness will take over the day this very night, the moon will not rise. Only a shadow will fill the sky. In the darkest hour, gallop with the soul of the silver stag, dance with the golden fire, and the man of vows will bend a knee at the feet of the Queen of Shadows.
I might have said that Spiritus was helpful two sentences too early. - "What do you mean?"
Tonight, you must decide. But do as I said, and the choice will be clear. - With that, the woman turned into silver mist, and evaporated into the air.
I was back in the present, sitting at the foot of the tree, but I wasn't alone anymore. A tall stag was standing front of me. The sky was black already, and the moon was black, just like Spiritus had told me. He was small, and young. His fur was white and light blue symbols glowed on his fragile body. His antlers were as white as snow. Even though the stag itself was young, it was still bigger than a horse.
The stag had bent a knee, and I gently stroked it's head.
It stood up, and turned his side towards me. I pulled myself up onto its back, and hugged its neck. As soon as the animal felt that I had a good grip, it began galloping down the steep mountain side between the olive trees, then it jumped through a stone gate, and the landscape changed.
Tall trees of pine surrounded us as he galloped as fast as the wind. Soon, other stags and deer joined him. Their hooves drummed on the soft ground, and the faint light of their light blue symbols made the whole forest glow. We got to a small meadow in the middle of the forest, and the stag looked back at me. I got off of it's back, and stroked his huge head. His small, black eyes shone warmly. I hugged the animal's neck, then let him go.
The meadow was lit by a little plunge pool of a waterfall, because the water glowed with the same dim light as the symbols on the stag. There was a man standing in the middle of the water. It was at his hips, and it left the man's back bare. His muscular body was perfectly shaped, and a tattoo was on his back. A tattoo of a phoenix.
His hands were lit by golden flames, just like the ones I use. He was taller than it seemed at the first, but as I got closer, I could see that he was way taller than me.
The phoenix on his back was embraced by two terrible scars in a V shape. the scars collided at the base of his back. The man had golden hair, floating around him. As he turned his head towards me, I already knew that my eyes would meet those aquamarine eyes that I thought I knew so well.
The man of Vows.... Rider Vower. It seemed like everything was circling around him, every road lead back to him. He was there, staring at me. It was time to dance with golden flames, so I spread my arms out wide, and let the golden fire burst from my fingertips. They crept up my arms until my elbows.
Rider reached out towards me.
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